When I was growing up, our Easter celebrations were more secular than religious. We had an Easter egg tree (well, branch), egg hunts involving cryptic clues, Easter baskets, cute bunnies running around, and a big dinner at my aunt's house. I was always very excited about it because I loved Easter candy. Nor am I alone in this - Americans spend 2.1 billion each year on Easter candy, second only to Halloween. Jelly beans, robin's eggs, peeps, various types of chocolates in the shape of eggs, chocolate bunnies, and more.
But my favorite were the Cadbury Creme Eggs. I never got enough of those. I felt I could eat dozens, but I only ever got one or two. Then when I entered my dieting phase, I was lucky if I got any; more often I found sugar-free candy in my basket, or more natural sweets like carob eggs.
Which is why I was excited when I went to Cadbury World in Birmingham, England. Even though it was November, almost as far from Easter as possible, they had bins of the creme eggs! I was ecstatic. I greedily stocked up, albeit surreptitiously, since I was a little embarrassed about my host seeing me with all that candy.
As I lost weight, though, I found that eating an entire Cadbury egg was a little too much because they were so rich. When they introduced the mini crème eggs, I felt like they read my mind – one of those tiny eggs was perfect for me. It gave me the taste without being overwhelming.
This year, though, something changed. I went to the store and looked at the mini eggs, planning to buy them out of habit. Except - I realized I didn't want them. I could still remember loving them when I was younger, a very tactile memory including the intense sweet burst of chocolate shell and gooey, sugary caramel interior. I appreciated the memory, but I had no desire to eat one again, knowing my stomach would not like it.
Walking out of the store empty-handed felt strange, even a little sad, almost like losing that connection to my childhood. Then I realized it wasn't a loss, not truly. I will always remember how much I loved them, but perhaps now on Easter I can focus on the themes of rebirth and renewal represented by the eggs, instead of only thinking about the Cadbury Creme ones.